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Here we are, Weston, about to witness one of the Owl’s greatest failures. Humorlessness has won over tongue in cheek and it’s all downhill from here, my fine Westonians. In spite of the Owl’s repeated requests to revert to the originally and hilariously named “Resident Shredding Day”, Town Hall is refusing to bow to media pressure and has committed to “Document Shredding Day for Residents.” One would almost think that someone ACTUALLY showed up with residents to be shredded.

I can’t make the official switch, so I plan to use the old graphics until The Weston Owl closes up publication which may or may not be soon. Humor is the last to die and yet, here we are. Remember, folks, facts do not bring on laughter, only silliness can. Ugh. Fine, go shred your victims tomorrow–the Weston Police have already said this is the ONLY resident shredding opportunity this year so bring them all.

Now, I shall go attempt to regain my sense of humor by watching Tacoma FD.

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RESIDENT SHREDDING DAY will be held this Saturday, June 3 from 9 am to 1 pm at the Weston Police Station. As always, no non-residents may be shredded–they goop up the apparatus.

This event is for those who have a great deal of household shredding to be done (things do tend to pile up). Community shredding is the way to go–shred as many as you want–it’s the same price: free.

Residents can shred by bringing their victims to the Police Station at 180 Boston Post Road By-Pass on Saturday. After that, you will need to wait for the next shredding day or use your home shredder. This gets messy.